Shark or Dolphin? Night One Bachelor Recap


photo via ABC

Wow. Wow. What a night.

If I could have described exactly how I wanted night one to go to the producers, they would have pulled through. CRAZY.

The thirty hand-picked women arrived at the mansion to meet our Bachelor, Nick Viall. So many wore red dresses. So many had awkward first encounters.

But most importantly Nick gave his first impression rose to, Rachel, who it should be noted is a black woman. This is huge considering a black woman got the first rose rather than getting sent home:

But I’m getting ahead of myself. Where should we start? These are my 20 takeaways from night one:

    1. Nick had bleach blonde hair in high school giving serious 90’s vibes in those high school prom pictures.
    2. His little sister, Bella gave him advice. I need more of her on this show to be the voice of reason.
    3. Rachel, the lawyer, is a perfect contestant. I can’t wait for her to win this whole thing or at least be the next Bachelorette.
    4. Danielle L. owns three nail salons? I love these women with their badass careers.
    5. Josephine is awesome. So glad she got a rose. I thought she might be too quirky to get a rose the first night, but she pulled through. I want to be best friends with her.
    6. Raven, who I mentioned in my last post, had a second notable quote (beyond her shooting, mudding and reading the bible comment) by saying her hometown can be described by “”Family, faith and football because that is all we have”. Someone get this girl to a city.
    7. Danielle M. is amazing. One of my guy friends texted in our group chat that she was his top contestant. She has “wife-y” written all over her. Definitely in the running for a place in the final two.
    8. Corinne, Corinne, Corinne. You are 24 years old and proudly say that you are a multi-million dollar business owner. Do not also proudly say that you couldn’t survive without your nanny. Watching her is like watching a car crash. I fully expect her to make it to final 5 or 6, but I don’t see her getting a hometown date.
    9. Taylor brought up racism she has faced in her package. Whoa. So excited to see this show being progressive. They just need to get on the feminist train now…
    10. Christen had a painfully awkward entrance with that massive yellow fan. She was too starstruck when meeting Nick. Yikes.
    11. Sarah made me laugh when she came in the house and yelled “Oh my good there’s food.” A girl after my own heart.
    12. Taylor had a moment reminiscent of Chantal’s entrance on Brad Womack’s second season.
    13. Jasmine G. brought Neil Lane (of Bachelor fame) on her entrance which killed me. You have to love a girl who knows what she wants. Especially since those rings are always so horrible, I’m glad she is taking things into her own hands. Never trust a man.
    14. When Liz (who has made it clear that she and Nick had sex the night of Jade and Tanner’s wedding) entered she didn’t say anything but Nick clearly knew who she was. Their encounter was so uncomfortable, but I’m impressed how she spun it to be a positive?

15 . Nick later seemed hurt that she never reached out to him. Damn. DAMN.

16. Danielle M. and Nick have instant chemistry. She seems like the typical choice for a Bachelor “wife-y” however she isn’t what I expect of Nick’s choice. Interesting to see how that will play out.

17. Corinne is not doing herself any favors with that awkward kiss on night one. When Nick commented that it was forced, that doesn’t play well for her.

18. No one knows whether or not Alexis is wearing a shark or dolphin costume. Scratch that. Everyone knows she’s wearing a shark costume. She is the only one who believes it is a dolphin. Oh yeah, did I mention her career is “aspiring dolphin trainer”?

19. Rachel got the first impression rose. This is MASSIVE considering POC rarey get any visibility on this show. She and Nick are obviously clicking so I cannot wait to see her journey this season. I’m routing for her to be the next Bachelorette because she deserves better than Nick.

20. No one really notable got sent home. I didn’t know the names of any of them. They were all really mad that shark/dolphin girl got a rose over them, but I wasn’t mad.

This season had begun on a particularly ridiculous notes. Congratulations in advance to the producer and their increase in ratings *eye roll*.


The Bachelor is (almost) back!!!

So here are a few of my favorite things: The Bachelor, The Bachelorette, and Bachelor in Paradise. Yup, I am a member of Bachelor Nation. I am not crazy though. As a killjoy feminist, I watch the show through that lens and try to be critical when the show inevitably gets into cringeworthy territory. Also, I’ve seen UnReal, and understand how heavily produced the show can be. However, I still route for the bachelor or bachelorette because as crazy as it seems, sometimes this process works!

For example some of the contestants from seasons past, Ashley and JP, Sean and Catherine, Desiree and Chris, Kaitlyn and Shawn, Ben and Lauren, Jojo and Jordan and Carly and Evan (my faves!!!!). I would just like to say I am obsessed with all these couples especially Kaitlyn and Shawn as well as Carly and Evan. If you don’t have Kaitlyn on snapchat (@snapbackbean) do it! She’s so funny and her love of Shawn’s dog Doodle is the best. Also Carly’s new dog Huck is adorable so please take a follow of her on Instagram (@carlywad) where she frequently documents his adventures on instastories. Also she and Evan were in a holiday decoration competition with their neighbors. It was so domestic, I love it.

Moving onto our present season, tonight Nick Viall of Andi and Kaitlyn’s seasons of the Bachelorette as well as the last season of Bachelor in Paradise, will be at the helm of The Bachelor in the title role. I am so excited. While on the Bachelorette, Nick was clearly the villain of both seasons. However, the producers have a heavy hand in how contestants are portrayed. I go deep down the rabbit hole of Bachelor gossip, and rumors have been floated that perhaps Nick’s storyline on Kaitlyn’s season wasn’t authentic and needed to spice up a season that would have been boring otherwise. As well as on Andi’s season, Nick was only made to be the villain to distract from that season’s “winner” Josh’s genuine wickedness. In Andi’s recently released book she describes abuse allegations against Josh. Just saying…

I always liked Nick so I’m beyond excited for this show. He has some interesting ladies lined up. Here are the notable ladies seen in the intro package previews from the “Countdown to Nick” show that aired Sunday. Let us begin:

Corinne is a multi-million dollar business owner. She repeated this very confidently in her package as well as in all the previews. She also seemed very aggressive in the previews (specifically sexually). I’m all about ladies owning her sexuality ,but unfortunately I don’t think it is going to help her on the show. A contestant that says “my vagina is platinum” doesn’t translate to the “wife-y” type to the producers.

Jasmine G. is a Golden State Warrior dancer, and this girl has serious confidence and from what I saw in the promos, that is going to intimidate the girls. Important to note that she is an African American contestant. Historically contestants of color don’t make it very far but I think that is going to change this season. I also want to put her in the running for the next Bachelorette. I am dying to see a person of color at the head of this franchise!

Rachel is another African American contestant. She’s a lawyer from Texas and definitely has her life together. She is a clear front runner for me, and I love her already. She makes it as far as Finland which could be far along in the season depending on if it is the first or second destination for the show. I really hope she makes it to the final three because I’m just putting it out there, she is my choice for the next Bachelorette.

Christen is quite the contestant. Her package featured a declaration stating that she was saving herself for marriage for “faith-based” reasons. This was followed by a very sexual moment of her straddling a horse. Ugh. She’s going to throw girls under the bus who are being too sexual with Nick. She’ll be the foil villain to Corinne because she’s going to stir up drama with the next notable contestant…

Elizabeth! She was the maid of honor at Jade and Tanner’s wedding and apparently that evening she and Nick spent the night together. I’m a little disappointed because all we know about her so far is that she and Nick have hooked up, and I want to know more about her life! I truly hope her personality and substance is showcased over her prior relations to Nick.

The rest of these contestants were not featured in promo packages, but I think they are notable:

Danielle M. – From her bio online, it is very clear that her story will be based around the lost of her fiancé. I think she’s going to be top 4 contestant and will at least get a hometown date. Definitely a frontrunner. I wouldn’t be surprised if they keep her around because her storyline is definitely one they could work with if she were to be the next Bachelorette.

Olivia and Taylor – I don’t know much about these contestants, however, they were both featured quite frequently in the previews without going into detail which could hint that they will go far. Taylor is a counselor and really seems to have it together. Nothing that notable about Olivia, honestly.

Jaimi – I don’t think Jaimi will go far, HOWEVER, in the promo she discussed telling Nick about her past girlfriend. STOP THE PRESSES. I am beyond excited to have some LGBT representation on the show. I am really nervous that she’ll describe it as a “phase” because I would love to have bisexual visibility on the show.

I am so excited for this show, and I can’t wait for the episode tonight. Will definitely have more to say come Tuesday! See ya then!